Chapter 61: A Contemporary Open Conspiracy: Nine-Turn Intestines

"Pfft~ Normally I wouldn't laugh, but this time I really couldn't hold it in."
The audience burst out laughing at Xu Xiu's reaction.
"What a genius! Those green beans are indeed not old; they're just completely inedible."
"Xu Xiu, tell the truth, how much did Sister Meng pay you? Did she bribe you? This is your life-saving money right here!"
"You've got some nerve eating that kind of dark cuisine. It must be true love! Certified 'Xu You Yi Meng'!"
"Sister Meng is running a Dark Gardenia operation. If anyone actually ate her green beans, nobody would be getting out of bed tomorrow—straight to the ICU for all of you!"
In the dining room.
Meng Ziyi playfully punched Xu Xiu with a smile.
"What are you doing~ Why did you spit out the green beans? Are they really that hard to swallow?"
Xu Xiu's face turned green: "Sister Meng, you know I'm against wasting food, but this isn't even a matter of whether it can be eaten anymore—it's life-threatening!"
"Can I just refund your money? I still want to live a few more years. I surrender, please spare me!"
With that, Xu Xiu pulled out his phone to process the refund, but Meng Ziyi stopped him with a fierce glare, as if she would murder him on the spot if he dared to take out his phone.
"Don't frame me~ I didn't pay you to eat them~ What kind of evil intentions could a kind-hearted little girl like me possibly have~"
Ah, right, right, right!
Should I believe you, or should I believe that I am Qin Shi Huang?
Yet someone just had to defy common sense. Song Dan adjusted her breathing and picked up another piece of green bean with her chopsticks.
Chew, chew, chew~
"Mmm~ Delicious! These green beans are crispy on the outside and tender on the inside, absolutely delicious."
Wang Sulong and the others winced with distorted expressions. Xu Xiu reached out to stop Song Dan:
"Mama Dan, we don't need to try this hard. We only make a few hundred thousand a month, why are you risking your life!"
"Go on, go on, stop talking nonsense. Sister Meng cooked this and it's clearly delicious." Song Dan genuinely liked Meng Ziyi a lot.
A girl who could take a joke and act cute at the same time was simply her absolute favorite type.
She even followed everyone else's lead and started calling Meng Ziyi "Sister Meng."
Meng Ziyi was experiencing sheer ecstasy internally!
She coughed to compose herself, put on an overly dramatic and cheesy heart gesture for Song Dan, and said:
"Sister Dan is truly so warm~ Wherever Sister Dan is, there is home~" After saying that, she even blinked at Song Dan, and Song Dan blinked right back in response.
"I'm not just flattering her, Sister Meng really cooks exceptionally well."
"Sister Dan~ perhaps this is the taste of home~"
"..."
Xu Xiu didn't understand, but he was utterly shocked!
Being sandwiched between these two felt so agonizing; the sheer cringe was making him a bit nauseous.
"Hug~"
"Hug!"
Instead of just saying it, the two actually reached across Xu Xiu and hugged each other.
This caused Xu Xiu to step back repeatedly, holding both arms up in front of him like an eager puppy.
"Hey?! Folks, is there a basin? I want to throw up, quickly find me a basin!"
"Pia~"
"Pia!"
Both of Xu Xiu's arms were slapped simultaneously by the two women.
"You unlucky kid."
"Hmph~"
Just as they were messing around, Wang Churan also picked up a small piece of green bean and popped it into her mouth.
The moment it touched her tongue... her expression changed drastically!
But noticing that Meng Ziyi had turned to look at her, she forced down the discomfort and swallowed it.
"Churan, how is it? Is it delicious?"
Wang Churan forced a smile that looked worse than crying: "Delicious! Mengmeng~ Your culinary skills have really improved~"
These words instantly made Meng Ziyi beam with joy, and she stepped forward to give Wang Churan a huge hug.
Meng Ziyi gradually lost herself amidst all the praise about how delicious it was, even harboring the illusion that she still had what it took.
After lunch.
Since everyone was familiar with each other by now, Xu Xiu didn't stand on ceremony, leaving the dishwashing to someone else.
In an environment like this, not taking a nap would be a complete waste.
However, when he returned to the dormitory, he found a task card and drawing boards left by the director's team, instructing roommates to draw portraits of each other.
This was truly hitting a sore spot. The tiny fraction of artistic talent Xu Xiu possessed was entirely dedicated to singing and acting, and his drawing skills were utterly indescribable.
"Brother Jun, can you draw?"
"Oh, I'm alright."
With that, Wang Chuanjun directly stuck his butt out and sprawled flat on the floor, radiating a vibe unique to artists.
Unconstrained by trivialities, unconventional, and a bit bohemian.
In no time, a handsome face of Xu Xiu appeared on the drawing board.
Xu Xiu was left completely numb: "You call this 'alright'?"
Wang Chuanjun shrugged and spread his hands.
Brilliant!
He really managed to flex with that one. Why are people nowadays so effortlessly pretentious when showing off?
When it was Xu Xiu's turn, he nibbled on his paintbrush, completely clueless about where to start, scratching his head until it was almost bald.
After making the very first stroke, Xu Xiu decided that this stroke needn't be continued; he might as well just lie down and chat for a bit.
"Brother Jun, are you full?"
"Full, hahaha, let me tell you, I ate three bowls of rice!"
"Oh, did you eat the Nine-Turn Intestines?"
"I did, it was quite delicious, went really well with rice."
"Goes well with rice, huh? Actually, I originally wanted to leave behind some of the raw ingredients of the dish, which probably would have gone even better with rice. That way everyone would have known for sure that he was eating intestines."
Wang Chuanjun: "!???"
"But then I thought better of it, figuring people might not be used to that flavor, and most importantly, I was afraid they would beat me up!"
Wang Chuanjun's brow furrowed tightly, as if he were trying to visualize that exact scene.
At this moment, the audience's expression was identical to Wang Chuanjun's.
"Holy cow! Wait a minute, what the heck? What does 'raw ingredients' mean?"
"Oh great, it's Xu Xiu. We're in for a treat, don't worry, it's exactly what you're thinking. To put it nicely, it's 'oliqiao'; to put it bluntly, it's crap!"
"I seem to remember an old acquaintance whose overt stratagem still remains unsolved to this day."
"Hahaha, no wonder it felt a bit familiar, it's that little chubby guy! If you don't eat it, you can't evaluate or eliminate me; if you do eat it, you've genuinely eaten shit!"
"I'd call this the number one overt stratagem of the modern era! Xu Xiu, if you really copy him, you won't just get beaten up, you'll get beaten to death!"
[Ding! Detected that the host's abstract behavior has gained exposure, singing skill +0.0069... acting skill +0.0069... cooking skill +0.0069... physical fitness +0.0069...]
Hearing the system's prompt tone, if he had really left the raw ingredients behind, this wave might have reaped a massive harvest and even broken the charts!
But Xu Xiu couldn't drain the pond to catch all the fish. If he really did that, he'd probably get boycotted by everyone and forced to quit the show...
"Why are you telling me something like that? Don't you know I just finished eating!" Wang Chuanjun wore a bewildered expression.
"Oh, sorry, I forgot..."
"..."
At this moment, the expression on Wang Chuanjun's face was magnificent, and he looked like he had a lot to say yet stopped himself.
Xu Xiu, however, happily reaped another wave of exposure value.
Trapping your older brothers should be done early; Wang Chuanjun was only around forty years old, the prime age to go out into the world... and get scammed!
Brother, don't be afraid! The outside world is full of Xu Xiu!